MARRIED IN SCHOOL, SINGLE AT HOME
Thinking about this topic, I’ve been wondering who the focus of this post should be – girls or guys or both. In almost every tertiary institution in Nigeria, you find ‘undergraduate couples’ living as husbands and wives. You find a lot of these misguided people in UNN. It’s so bad that, often times, they are duly recognized and acknowledged as couples by lodge neighbours, classmates and even leaders of various students associations. Little wonder there is such an award as “The best couple of the year award” shamelessly and thoughtlessly received by students.
Like I said earlier, I really don’t know the particular gender to address but let me just keep typing. The rate at which girls live with their boyfriends in their various off campus hostels is painfully alarming. Most times, these young girls are very beautiful, with bright and promising future. They cohabit with boys who are their fellow students as roommates. The lugubrious part of it is that the silly girl would always introduce the small boy as her fiancé.
Our society is really sick courtesy of those that live in it. These girls collect either hostel fees or house rents from unsuspecting (and sometimes, struggling) parents and end up in the house of a boy. You struggled possibly for several years to gain admission. Then you suddenly became a prayer warrior posting and shouting ‘Amen’ at the slighted provocation. You fasted. You had one prayer point filled with promises of your loyalty and devotion to God if only He would answer your prayer. Now that He has fulfilled His part by answering and granting you admission, don’t you think He is expecting you to fulfill your own part, to keep whatever promises you made to Him??
Many of you just got admission and once you settle down (especially from your second year), crazy thoughts will begin to creep into your minds. Yes by then, the heat of the rush would have been over; If God didn’t capture you (possibly through the various campus fellowships), boys would have caught you. Soon, they would persuade you to move in with them. Of course, they’d give you one thousand reasons to make you give in to their proddings.
Before you agree to move in and live with a boy on campus, consider the reason why you are in school in the first place. What image would you be creating about yourself? Can this boy marry you in case you get pregnant for him as is always the case, or will you resort to series of abortions like many other girls before you? What advice will you give your children in future concerning this kind of things? After school, what next? Will the relationship really lead you anywhere?
This post is finally addressing the female folks. I didn’t plan it that way. Maybe it’s because they are the worst hit by the grave consequences of illicit sexual relationships. They are the ones that turn out to be the sore losers in the end. They call it school life but they don’t realize how idiotic they have been till it’s too late. You are not in school to get married. Part of the reasons why you are in school IS NOT to get the husband-and-wife experience, to see what it feels like for the boy to provide the money for food and for the girl to go to the market for food stuffs and cook. That’s pure misplacement of purpose! One guy told me that he was practically learning how to be a caring and romantic husband. Such shamelessness! Then you hear the girl say, “We are not doing anything, we are just roommates”. Yet she commits countless abortions before graduation.
Yes, your admission has given you unlimited freedom. Yes, your parents are not there to tell you what to do or what not to do. There is even no blood relation around, so there’s no fear of someone reporting you. But what about giving your womanhood respect and protecting your dignity? What about living in such a way as to have a positive story to tell the next generation (including your children) without your conscience pricking you? What about guarding and keeping you virginity till you are married?
“Remember now your Creator in the days of your youth. Fear God and keep His commandments. For God will bring every work into judgment, Including every secret thing, Whether good or evil.” – Ecclesiastes 12:1,13,14